On first impressions and first experiences (Part 2)

The first week of training was also overwhelming in terms of the physical techniques and forms to be learned. A student first has to learn the eight basic forms before instructions can even begin on the first sword form. It’s a lot of unfamiliar movements in a sequence that has to be remembered quickly and precisely. And my first night, it was a challenge to put together the squats, defenses and thrusts of the first two basic forms correctly, when, as is the custom, Sa Bu Nim came into class to allow the students to demonstrate their most advanced forms.

Normally beginners like myself aren't asked to demonstrate their progress until they advance beyond the basics, but that evening Sa Bu Nim asked me to show him what I'd learned.

The good thing about moving meditation like Shim Gum Do, at least for me, is that I have to focus entirely on what I'm doing in the moment. So the presence of more advanced students watching, including black belts and masters, didn’t enter my mind. All I knew was myself and the instructions of my teacher giving what seemed like slight, but were in fact critical corrections.

(Sa Bu Nim demonstrating the basic techniques as pictured in the manual of course material)

One of the other students later told me, though, that they had all found that instruction informative, a new look at the correct way to perform the most basic, foundational techniques.

At my second class that week (Wednesday - I'd missed Tuesday due to a prior commitment), Sa Bu Nim also offered more personal instruction, after asking if I had learned the first sword form and perhaps not being satisfied with my progress. And It’s hard to explain how exciting the attention was, yet there was also a fear of disappointing him - of wasting his time - based partly in the knowledge that I was deliberately moving slowly because I was not doing any practice outside class time at the temple.

Part of that came from a concern that without an instructor, I wouldn't remember the order of the techniques (since remedied by getting the textbook, "The First Star Black Belt Forms of Shim Gum Do Zen Sword"). But the other concern is that I just don't have another place to practice.

Something tells me that my neighbors might respond poorly to the sight of a guy swinging a Samurai - style sword around in a parking lot on the Dorchester - Roxbury line. (I have visions of flashing blue lights, yelling, lying face down in the asphalt, handcuffs and hopefully not tazers or gunfire.) But ‘mind training’ - meditation on the forms I'm learning - can make up for some of that too.

Two evening classes that first week, followed by a Saturday session of class, floor washing and then another class made a pretty good start. But since then, I've been trying to make three evening classes as well as Saturday each week. Knowing I need to attend as many classes as I can to get the greatest benefit from the training - physically as well as mentally and spiritually - definitely threw a wrench into my plans of establishing more settled routine. But I think this definitely qualifies as a ‘creative disruption’ and an antidote to any tendencies I have to get too sedate or idle - and the training was just the start.

On first impressions and first experiences (Part 1)

Starting anything new can be kind of overwhelming. And my first week of Shim Gum Do classes proved no exception. First there was the rush to get me equipped with a uniform, a sword of appropriate length and a bit of basic instruction in how to tie my very new white belt.

Some of the rituals, like bowing on entering or leaving certain rooms or taking off my shoes on entering the temple  (the big empty shoe racks immediately inside the door help with that one), we're pretty easy to pick up. Others, like knowing when to bow during the opening and closing rituals of class, I'm still working on mastering (when in doubt bow).

Those of you who have known me for a while might be surprised to know that (especially for the first classes) I actually arrived early and so found myself with a bit of time in the lobby/foyer area of the temple. So I started poking through an older book - a first history of Chang Sik Kim's early experience and the revelation and development of Shim Gum Do to him as the Great Zen Master Chang Sik Kim, known as Sa Bu Nim to his students. Sa Bu Nim's history and the development of the art are detailed elsewhere and as a beginner I'm in no position to say anything definitive about either.

But I was very drawn to two parts of an introductory passage in the book. The first was the mantra that my teacher's temple drew from it's heritage to instruct him as a young student, the same mantra those new to meditation are encouraged to use as a focus during meditation in Sa Bu Nim's Mind Light Temple in Brighton -- Kwan Seum Bosal ("Perceive World Sound" or compassionate listening, as it was explained to me).

This resonated and resonates with me and my understanding of my Quaker faith. One of the foundations of Quakerism is that there is 'that of God' within everyone and so everyone can communicate with the divine without the intercession of a priest or a minister. This has lead many Quaker meetings to begin with a period of silent worship in which all present listen for the leadings of Holy Spirit to call them into ministry to the rest of the meeting. As a result, I have begun incorporating that mantra and other meditative teachings from the temple into some of my Quaker worship - as some of my Quaker practice has seeped into my meditation at the temple ... I've been meditating this way for decades, after all.

The other passage that really spoke to me was from a story that I'm told Sa Bu Nim tells frequently from his early life, before he was even a student, serving as a helper in the monastery with the master who recognized his gift. The story spoke of how the master became angry one day when he discovered that his flower had not been watered and was withering, on the verge of death. He yelled at the young Chang Sik Kim, even though watering the flower was not the young man's responsibility. Instead of becoming defensive, he simply went to water the flower to see if it could be revived. This alone is a good lesson in the importance of patience, of humility rather than defiance, but it was what came next that really struck me. Chang Sik Kim realized that without water the flower would die - that water was so essential to the flower it was a mantra for it's life. And so, the story related, he realized that without his personal "life's mantra" (my term as I struggle to understand) he too would wither and die.

This concept, of needing to focus on a life's mantra, really resonates with my present search for meaning, purpose or direction in my life.

It's not entirely clear to me if Sa Bu Nim's 'life mantra' of revealing and disseminating the art and practice of Shim Gum Do was one that he always had within him and that his teacher at the time simply helped him evoke it or if it came about through some other process. But I certainly hope that my study of the mind sword path and the clarity of thought it promises to promote, will assist me in my efforts to find the purpose I hope to discern to lead my own life.

[Part 2 of my first week's impressions will be posted in a few days - remember that bit about things being overwhelming at the top? ;) Hopefully that will also give me some more time to play with formatting and that fun stuff too.]

Beginning a New Journey

Welcome friends, new and old.

My name is Brendan, and I’m a freelance writer, editor and communications consultant who moved to Boston after a career primarily in newspapers and wire services covering politics and breaking news at the local, state and, ultimately, national level in Washington, D.C., as a Congressional and White House correspondent. But after more than a decade of focusing almost solely on my career, I found I needed a break.

And so, with the passage of some time, I’ve come to Boston, reconnecting with friends from my past – some who go back to my high school and undergraduate days – as well as to rebuild a more active spiritual life through my membership in the Religious society of Friends (more commonly known as Quakers).

It was strange for me, after so long pursuing the goal of advancement in journalism, to be without a guiding purpose for my life, and I have struggled with that since I left D.C. But earlier this year I was given (and was finally able to hear) the advice to be patient, to try new things, to not be afraid of running into obstacles and to be open to and more aware of the coincidences and leadings of my spirit – or the Holy Spirit*

So it was through this last practice that I discovered the American Buddhist Shim Gum Do Association – located in a beautiful converted Christian church in Brighton on my commute between my home in Dorchester and my work with a non-profit in Watertown.

Despite the best efforts of my parents to raise me as a Quaker from age 2 ½ or so – when they became Quakers by convincement – with no war toys and avoiding violent television and the like, I’ve had a lifelong fascination with the sword. Star Wars – the original trilogy – undoubtedly played a role here, as did the fact that it was books of mythology and legends that first spared my lifelong love of reading … much of which has been in the science fiction and fantasy genres. I even dabbled in Olympic fencing (foil and saber) a bit in college.

And there was the sign, right in front of me (actually, off to the left a bit, I was driving after all), “ZEN – Sword, Karate, Meditation.” I wasn’t so interested in the Karate side, but the Zen sword part intrigued me enough that I kept an eye on the place as I drove by a few times a week.

Then came the sign that (figuratively and literally) sealed the deal – a meditation session and dharma talk with a Zen master on the first Friday of the month; this coming at a time when I had been feeling tense, discontented and wondering how I might incorporate more meditation in my life anyway.

Despite having some difficulty hearing Zen Master Chang Sik Kim (a soft spoken man) over the noise of the fan in the room on Sept. 4, and some further difficulty deciphering his accent, I was very impressed with the wisdom he shared.

Fast forward a few weeks of discussions with other high-degree masters at the “Mind Light Temple,” gathering of finances for course fees, uniforms and a practice sword, and I have started walking the “Mind Sword Path” – the translation of Shim Gum Do from Korean to English.

In future posts in this space I’ll be exploring my experiences and thoughts as I learn more about the practice as well as the Zen teaching behind the physical actions and meditative forms and I hope you’ll follow along on as I walk through these doors.

Two final notes: I was attracted to this practice, in part, because it was stressed to me several times before I began that the actual use of Shim Gum Do is meant only as a last resort, when one is actively fighting for his or her life, and that the notion of entering tournaments or seeking of trophies as displays of skill is definitely discouraged. That said, my personal belief in the Quaker Peace Testimony and in nonviolence is almost certain to be the source some internal struggles that I will share here.

*In regards to terms around God, religion and Christianity. I personally would describe myself as a Christian-leaning Deist, meaning that I believe in a God and miracles that are still active in the world today and I tend to express that belief in Judeo-Christian language – partly because that’s the language that comes most naturally to mind.

That said, I personally and many members and Meetings of the Religious Society of Friends are working to discern what the Puritan, Protestant Christianity of the founders of our faith still means in light of the spirit of continuing revelation and the founding tenant of Quakerism that everyone can access the divine directly.

So please know that I mean no offense by my inclusion or omission of any specific religious references, and do not hesitate to let me know if offense is inadvertently given and I will try to address it as quickly and appropriately as possible.